SONG DESCRIPTIONS:
"HAM FOR THE HOLIDAYS!" CD

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Ham for the Holidays!
CD SONG LIST:
Ham for the Holidays, I Tricked Nick,
If Farts Were Made Out of Superball Stuff,
Fruitcake, Art

SONG LYRICS: CLICK HERE!

MEET "TOMMY" TURKEY:
CLICK HERE!

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"I Tricked Nick"

A coming of age song about stealing kisses from Santa's
nephew "Nick." Boldly sung, yet innocently stated, this is
the perfect song for a yound career artist in the pop/rock
genre to cover. It's a fun update of "I Saw Mommy
Kissing Santa Clause" "You've all met Santa,
but did anyone know? Sometimes he takes along his
nephew Nicky in tow. Only twenty-0ne and a face full of fun.
The minute we met, I had to get me some! I tricked Nick
into thinkin' I'm good. I tricked Nick into thinkin' I would.
Pick a toy, when he offered a gift, but when he got near,
I whispered in his ear ...Nick, Nick, kiss me quick.

I wrote this song because there simply are NOT enough
new holiday songs that appeal to young people.
The pop music is fresh and modern. The vocals are
aggressive and sexy. The lyrics put a new twist on
"The Night Before Christmas." The hook, "I tricked Nick,"
is infectious. This is a fun update of "I Saw Mommy
Kissing Santa Clause" that will appeal to
"kids" from 5 to 105.

SIMILAR ARTISTS:
JESSICA SIMPSON, KELLY CLARKSON

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"HAM FOR THE HOLIDAYS"

Lynn Julian, was commissioned by the "Trouble With Turkey" coalition to compose the themesong for their latest campaign.
Their spokesperson is Tommy, a ten year old turkey, who is
trying to educate humans about alternatives to their typical
holiday feast this season: HIM. The focal point of the awareness campaign is HAM: it’s juicier for roasting, turkey’s dry.
They hope Julian's theme song, "Ham For The Holidays,"
will help folks remember this fact. Dr. Demento loved the tune
so much he brought international attention to the song when
he played it 2 weeks in a row during the 2004 holiday season.
This was a tremendous honor, as Julian's indie song was
played between big name artists Adam Sandler and Arlo Guthrie. Julian recently also received international recognition when her song won Honors in this years' Great American Song Contest.

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"FRUITCAKE"

The young storyteller here is, indeed, a FRUITCAKE.
How utterly lonely it must be, to be the fruitcake on a
holiday buffet... year... after year... after year. It must feel
kind of similar being the fruitcake of the family.
(Come on... *every* family's got a fruitcake!)
Laugh along with Lynn 'Julian' on this EPIC COMEDY...

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"IF FARTS WERE MADE OUT OF
SUPERBALL STUFF"

"Farts" is about...well...just that...*smile*!
We all have 'em and we all try to ignore 'em.
This humorous song with super sound effects that glorify gas!
"If farts were made out of Superball stuff,
they'd bounce right back when they fell from your butt!
Just imagine the free tiny toys they would be!
In my pocket, I'd keep them to through at your feet..."
The tongue in cheek lyrics, the all too real sound effects
and the unforgetable hooks make this tune a "must hear!"

SIMILAR ARTISTS:
WEIRD AL YANKOVIC, ADAM SANDLER, FRANK ZAPPA

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"ART"

"Art" is a friendly, yet misunderstood, reptile who just wants to be loved! Listening to this twisted tale just makes you want to hear it... again.

SIMILAR ARTISTS:
RANDY NEWMAN, DISNEY, DREAMWORKS
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